Where Keish is more than an obscure food!

ABOUT ME

I'm awesome. See how it doesn't rain on me when I walk down the street in a storm? That's cause I sold my soul to the devil.

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Keish= Good. Quiche= Bad.

It doesn't take much to excite me lately. Especially since I haven't had sex in a few weeks now. So it really got me hot to see my blog could be "Googled". No, I didn't google my own blog, I found it in the referral section of my site meter (for those of you who don't know, site meter watches you watch my site).
Anyway, I saw it. Someone was looking for "quiche" the food, but they typed "keish", my name. I'm not sure I like being mistaken for a mediocre hors d' Odouvre. They're like the party food outcast. People buy them cuz they see them in the frozen foods department and think "Oh, cheese/spinach quiche, sounds classy. It must be good." Then later at the party, someone has one and you can see it in their face when they bite into it, that they rather have had the shrimp cocktail. Then like an STD, everybody avoids the quiche tray. It gets cold, it tastes worse. You take note that the party host is offended that no one ate the quiche. So you figure you could take a few, you hide some in your napkin, then under the sofa cushion, since you're too lazy too get up you kick a few under the chair or over to the dog. At the end of the night, you will be responsible for the horrible rat problem your friend (the party host) will have in the near future. Then they get evicted and come live with you, because you felt guilty for starting it all. Surprisingly, they don't like your famous graham cracker stuffing, and you see your first roach...


Posted by TastyKeish at 1:41 PM
5 comments

 

HO! HO! HO!!!

I want to thank all my family and friends for coming over and seeing me, as I am slightly too medicated (and lazy) to drive. And thank you all that have been coming to see me via this blog.

I had a good holiday with the family, had a nice dinner on "C.P" time, four hours late...
Dad had a couple bottles of wine...with his meal. Mom would not stop talking. My brothers were actually civilized. In the end, I took a painkiller went to my room and watched that thing on the History Channel about the many ways God uses natural disasters to punish man. After watching it, I decided to start going to church again.
You know...just in case.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!


Posted by TastyKeish at 11:17 PM
2 comments

 


Progress.... This pic might be to raw for some of you but for Christmas I wanted to show you how far I've come since surgery. As you can see the lip ans nose surgery went well. I'm still swollen, and yes.....those are boogers.


Posted by TastyKeish at 11:16 PM
0 comments

 

Stop Staring....

I wanted to thank all of you for all the well wishes and just stopping by my blog. Thanks!

I also wanted to tell you about my first excursion out since the surgery. I went to the doctor yesterday, and when your dealing with a plastic surgeon, you notice that post surgically, you dont have to wait long in the waiting room. Apparently, they don't want your ugly ass out front scaring potential customers. So they had me in an empty room in the back. That was fine with me, I just wanted to get some of this crap out and off my face.

Afterwards, My dad and I went to the mall because he is completely inept at picking out his secret santa gift for work. Going to the mall was such a bad move. It was sooooo crowded and busy, my face started hurting and I was getting cranky. And you know how people are.... they stare. Which I didn't mind, I felt bad walking around children looking the way I did, But adults are so freaking nosy. It's okay to look for a couple seconds, you can even do a double take, that I understand. But when you're on line and you can't reach into your wallet because you're busy looking at me, there's a problem.

So I dealt with it. I said to the lady "I got a nose job for Christmas, What did your husband get you? Not much..."

Then I went home and self medicated.




Posted by TastyKeish at 11:08 PM
4 comments

 


This is a side view of my nose without the bandages. Perhaps those are boogers slowly leaking down onto my lip.........perhaps.


Posted by TastyKeish at 11:07 PM
0 comments

 

Home Again...

I don't know if you've seen the pic of me below, but lemme know if you want the full monty.

I'm been home on some of those yummy painkillers and antibiotics and steriods that keep me free of bruising and black eyes you usually see people that have had plastic surgery have.
I had to share my room with this whiny girl that kept moaning all night for painkillers and she wouldnt take the tylenol she was offered. If i was her i be happy to get anything at all! What is wrong with people??? I had the worst night, I threw up four times. Once for everytime I wanted to goto the bathroom. So up came the jello, then up came the rice, then up came whatever little bit of stomach contents I had left. I should have thrown up on the moaning girl so she would let me sleep, lol.

Anyway, I'm afraid to eat now because I havent made "number 2" since the morning of the surgery. But if you come for a visit, I will accept baked goods, cheese, and ice cream.
If that doesn't make me "number 2", I don't know what will...


Posted by TastyKeish at 7:29 PM
5 comments

 


Me going home from the hospital. It looks worse under the bandage, but I wasnt sure if you could handle the blood. I had my nose and lip fixed from a life long cleft lip and palate.


Posted by TastyKeish at 7:27 PM
3 comments

 

PSYCHO...

I'm back. Finals are over, college is over for that matter. Thank God.
I'm glad i got outta there because I had a stalker for about two weeks. "Stalker!", you say. "Yea, stalker" I reply.

Like a month ago, my mom picked me up from campus (I let her do that sometimes, it makes her feel like she's needed) and she didn't see me. Being cheap, she refuses to get a cell phont till they cost 3.99 a month for an infinity minutes plan, so she borrowed somebody's cell phone. She called me really quick and got off..... No big deal right?

Wrong! Two weeks later some guy instant messages my phone, asking me if i'm Keisha and do i goto Brooklyn College, I thought it was someone I knew messin with me so i asked him who he
was. He stopped IM'ing me till the next couple days when he saw me online and started up again talking about how he wants to meet me calling me "sexy" and other "sexy" things you want freaky strangers to tell you. I asked him how he knew my name and he said he met my friend and let her borrow his phone and he just kept the number and remembered my name.
AIN'THAT SOME SHIT?!?!
He had the nerve to tell me some shit like that and still talk to me. And you know what he did next?

He called me. Remember, up till now he's been IM'ing my phone and online, now this guy CALLS me.

He gives me some sorry ass story about how he never did this before and he just wants to meet someone on campus and that he will be on campus monday, can we meet? I was so freaked out I said "I gotta go, bye".

Monday came and went and he sees me online and IM's me. I told him he shouldn't call people that never gave him their number, that shit it creepy. He got insulted and called me an "easy scare and shy" and that "you're not outgoing, I just want to meet a girl like me." Then he signed off. I was pissed and I didn't even get to write back and say how sick he was...
So I did the next best thing, I I'med his cell phone. That piece of shit harrassed me, now i'll harass him. But first I asked around about him and found out he's a Magilla Gorilla sophomore mofo that is 20 but looks like 35 years old and that he steals girls numbers from their cell phones when they aren't looking.

Anyway this is what I wrote to his cell phone:
"You tried to act like u never contacted someone anonymously before, but i asked about you. and my instinct was right. Mad people know you from SUBO, stealing girls phone numbers and trying to call them. I'm not shy or an easy scare. I pegged you as a freak and I was right. You lucky if I dont report you to security or something. I try to tell you what you were doing was weird, and you tried to insult me. Even the most freaky outgoing girl wouldn't meet you like that. And if they did, they stupid cuz if you were just alil more crazy you would probably be a serial killer.You have a long life to live and it's gonna be longer if you dont learn to socialize properly."

I should have called him a piece of shit at the end but I forgot. Anyway, I haven't heard from him since...

Anyway, keep your eyes open, I'll be posting my surgical update this weekend, as I am going to have my surgery tomorrow.

Who loves ya?


Posted by TastyKeish at 3:42 AM
3 comments

 

Busy as a....

...maggot in a dead body

Sorry I haven't been able to write regularly as possible but I'm not like those bloggers who have nothing better to do than tell you what color their sister's friends mom new hair color is, or what weird trick their pet does like lick their owners balls.

Anyway, it's that time of the year. Finals, and I'm caught up in it. You'll be hearing more of me in the coming days. Especially with another surgery coming up. If you've been following, you all know how weird I get after I have surgery.

Who loves ya?


Posted by TastyKeish at 7:30 PM
1 comments

 

Me and Snoop...

I been busy since Snookie (my bf, if you don't already know). Finals and projects due in the next week, but in the midst of it all. I took some time off and called my ol' buddy Snoop Dogg and asked him how I could get my pimp game back on top. He wasn't very helpful, he was like "Drop it like it's hot, Keish!". I was like "Snoop , Drop what?", and before you know it, the potato I was holding hit the floor. I gave him a stern look and said "there go our French Fries!"
He said "My bizadd kizzish, I'll fly you to Frizzance fo' some Frizz-eyes."

And then I woke up.


Posted by TastyKeish at 3:28 PM
2 comments

 

Leaving on a jet plane...

I'm not one of those girls that just blogs all day about what I been feeling, so we're not gonna go there; except to say that my boyfriend (who will furthermore be referred to as SNOOKIE) has just moved to florida in pursuit of a better life in the presence of like 101-year old old people (his parents). They might as well be dead, that's how old they are. That was harsh, wasn't it? Ok, they're like 900 years old combined, which makes my death argument even more fesible.
Anyway, his mom is a border line cleptomaniac, she can clean out a sugar and jelly holder like no other. And his dad is a tattoo artist that thinks he's a barber, and my dumb boyfriend "snookie", let him cut his hair over some weird grown man father/son bonding thing. Now he has to goto the hospital. Would you let a 15,000 year old man cut your hair? I think he deserved getting his ear cut off.

Anyway, Snookie's gone and it was tough yesterday. Blah, blah, blah, feelings, feelings,feelings...

I cried for like 3minutes and then I was extremely hungry.


Posted by TastyKeish at 11:57 PM
4 comments

 

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