Where Keish is more than an obscure food!


I'm awesome. See how it doesn't rain on me when I walk down the street in a storm? That's cause I sold my soul to the devil.

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The only candle you need in The End...



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These are for you...

Forgive me.
I've been such a bad blogger lately. I keep apologizing only to do it again. But you

know I love you right? I wouldn't do anything to hurt you....

So I haven't blogged in about a week, maybe two?
It doesn't mean I haven't been thinking about you baby.
You know how it is, I haven't been sleeping and I'm totally stressed out.
What? That's no excuse?
I know you have all those other blogs to look at, but you gotta remember we started this thing together. Last October, remember? The surgery blogs, "Cheesus", and being bitter about graduating college. You were there through all that.
Sunshine and rain boo....sunshine and rain.

Just give me a few more days. I swear I'll have a sexy new blog for you this weekend.

Nobody's blogs for you like I do.


Posted by TastyKeish at 8:47 PM


A few words from our Sponsor...

Blogs are like long instant messages, with comments as replies.
Anonymous commenters get under your skin like Crank Bugs (invisible bugs that crack head and meth heads itch at and pick at their skin- thats why they have open sores). But I leave the anonymous option open to users that don't want to become blogger.com members or people like the Al-Qaida, that don't want to come out of their virtual hole in the ground.

As far as IM's go:
I don't really LOL, I kind of chuckle.
When I write LMAO, am I really bouncing out of my chair laughing my ass off? Was the thing you said SOoooooooooooooooo funny I almost lost my mind? Probably not. But that's when I am LOL-ing.

They're just crazy, is all.

I'm just saying IM's and comments leave lots of room for interpretation. So don't be passive aggressive, leave an email so I can Spam your mailbox with porno and mortgage rates.

Posted by TastyKeish at 4:16 AM


Separate the colored from the whites...

Judging from my most recent foray into the world of doing laundry at a publilc facility, I can honestly say "I'm a dirty girl." I wish i meant it in a sexy way (which I do, after sundown on the weekends) but no, I really am a dirty girl. I waited to do my laundry until the last t-shirt was fully and sufficiently soiled to the point where I almost wore a bikini bottom to work.

Something had to be done. I went to the laundromat right after work. One might ask: "Keisha, don't you live in house with a washer and dryer?"

I would say: "Don't you know we're ghetto at my house and once something stops working, It stops working forever. Also, the fact that my retarded brother used to wash one shirt at a time, which made my dad ban him and start watching us put an acceptable amount of laundry in the washer".

On my wash-n-dry fest, I noticed something. Your laundry says something about who you are. Or who people percieve you to be. Apparently, my laundry says i'm an un fashionable male with kids. As I write this, I can honestly say, I have NOT grown a penis, some facial hair yes. Penis no. So when i'm folding one of 500 hundred tshirts, one should know they are some I've "borrowed" from ex's or my brothers, about 250 I've confiscated from my current bf, since he will wear a purple shirt with orange and green designs out in public. I can't have that happen and they have been happily converted to pajamas. Also I have really long arms and I don't bother wearing real shirts unless I have to. God plays this game with me, it goes: long arms+long legs+short torso+ braces= No America's Next Top Model for Keish!
But I got nice boobs, "So, HA God, HA".

Nowadays, when I get my laundry done, every now and then I get checked out (didn't I just say I had nice boobs?). But as soon as I start folding the twin sized sheet with the footballs or Elmo, it's automatically assumed that I have kids and Mr. Clean runs the other way. I don't have kids, but I got kids sheets. why let good sheets goto waste, i'll use them if nobody in the house will, Oh and i'm the only one in the house with a twin bed...which makes sex quite uncomfortable.

From the title, you thought this was gonna be some weird hate letter didn't you? Sick F-ck.

Posted by TastyKeish at 4:32 PM


What I wish I did for my Birthday.....

First, What I did on my Birthday:

I recently turned 24, which makes me almost the age where I start lying about my age. 'Round about 27, i'll be 24 again. Sounds about right...
Anyway, I actually went to work on my birthday, which people kind of look at me like i'm crazy cuz I rather make money then spend it. If that's the case, somebody needs
to tie me up and put me in a rubber room. Cause I'm just KA-RAY-ZAY!
What's really ironic was the fact that I went to a wake. On my birthday. It was for a relative of a close friend, so it's all good. Just got me thinking how f-ed up it would be if I droped dead on the ride to work. Then people would say "Damn, she's crazy, died driving to work on her birthday coming from a funeral...That's what you get when you don't goto the club." That, would be F-ed up .

Now, WHAT I WISH I DID FOR MY BIRTHDAY....is goto the Build-a-Bear store.
I saw a commercial for it. It's kind of a Chucky Cheese thing where each kid gets to design their own teddy bear and put alittle heart inside after making a wish. I would have gotten like 20 of my adult friends, in all seriousness to show up wearing their best gold chains and doo-rags. My homie Killa Keith would bring his boombox that he uses in his car cuz his radio got stolen, my homegirl Big D would bring some Coronas since she's half Puerto Rican/ half Black, I figure she got the hook up either way you look at it. And we all would just start making these lil bears, just like the kids do. And when it comes time to make a wish we would all wish at the same time that P. Diddy would stop trying to "Make a Band" and it would come true, due to the collective power of "keeping it real".

And then we would leave and goto a strip club.

Posted by TastyKeish at 6:18 AM



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